Two weeks of...not much.
The last two weeks, my legs and feet have been so painful that I got out for walks exactly twice each week (out of my goal of five times per week). (Well, that and the half mile every day because I am parking way at the back of the lot to ensure myself at least some exercise.
It was clear to me that it wasn't only my walking program that was going to suffer if I didn't do something. It wouldn't be long before I started to do myself real damage.
I got new walking shoes on Friday (Hurrah, payday!) and have been mostly wearing those all weekend, so I have high hopes for getting back into it this week.
23 July 2007
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Misti - I stumbled across your blog a couple of years ago and I enjoy reading it. I am a firm believer in the fact that there is more than 1 way to get where you want to go - We have very opposing views on child-rearing, education, religion, etc, so I find your perspectives very interesting and it seems like you are raising a very smart little boy who is ahead of his peers in many, many ways, maybe behind in a few others, which I am sure will catch up. Anyway, I am just curious why you have decided to keep his hair long? Has that caused any problems for him?
ReplyDeleteJessica,
ReplyDeleteWe have all chosen to keep our hair long. I have a beard that extends about a foot below my chin, and hair that now extends over halfway down my back.
For Misti and I, it is both an aesthetic and spiritual choice. As far as Jack is concerned, I don't believe in messing with the way things naturally grow and develop unless and until it becomes necessary. It is not necessary to cut his hair, so I don't. If, at a later date, he decides he wants to cut it, then at least that is a choice he has made.
As it turns out, his long hair makes him an integral part of our long-haired family.
It doesn't affect Jack a lot, except that he gets far better treatment from most folks when they think he is a girl.
I have witnessed enough short-haired boys with sweet disposition being mistaken for girls, and boisterous girls with long hair being mistaken for boys that the length of the hair has little to do with the stereotype.
It seems that a young man with good manners and sweet disposition is more than many folks can cope with.
Jack's hair has a far greater effect on people who make the mistake and then feel awkward.
Its a reasonable mistake I guess, but not something I get bothered about. I make sure I correct those who make the mistake, but beyond that I really don't care how small someone else's world is, just so long as my son gets as broad a world view as I can give him, so that he makes fewer mistakes of that kind.
I am amazed at how widespread the assumption of short-hair for boys is, and how small minded some folks can be about such a trivial matter.
My high school got over themselves on that issue in 1973.
Fair enough...I have a bald 9 month old and a bald husband myself...Thanks for your answer. Seems like you have a sweet boy on your hands, I hope the same for my little girl.
ReplyDeleteHi, Jessica!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment! I'm glad you find my perspectives interesting -- do you have a blog? ;) (I also read a lot of blogs by people with different perspectives and experiences from mine. I find it helps to broaden my world and over time has helped make me more tolerant.
Oh, Jack is basically ahead in reading and behind in a lot of other ways -- a lot like his mamma was. ;) He's a bright, sweet boy, but socially backward. Poor kid chose his parents badly that way.
You ask why we have "decided to keep Jack's hair long". As Rod says, we have reasons, both aesthetic and spiritual, for not cutting our own hair and they extend to our son. My older boys (ages 27 and 25) also didn't get their hair cut until they requested it. The younger of the two -- the owner of thick woolly hair -- asked for a hair cut the summer he tuned five. His hair was too hot! At 27, the older one still wears his hair long. Has it caused Jack (or TJ or Corey) any problems? Well, they have all been mistaken for girls. (Even when wearing t-shirts that say '100% boy'.) That would concern me a lot more if people didn't treat them a lot better when they think they're girls. And when Corey cut his hair into a classic boy cut at age 5, complete strangers still mistook him for a girl, so I think that the long hair wasn't the only issue. That said, we don't consider that "a problem" - - we gently correct people who make the mistake and life goes on. People will make all sorts of assumptions about us all the time and there is little we can do (or should do) about that. Their assumptions are their own baggage. c'est la vie.
Hair, like clothing, tattoos, scarification, and any number of external signs, is largely a matter of externalizing social and cultural identity. To Jack, to the extent that he concerns himself with such things, his hair is a sign that he is a member of this family. That people don't "get it" is no surprise. Some people don't "get it" about a lot of things!
Thanks for writing!